HE CERTAINLY LOOKED THE PART. HIS ROMAN COLLAR WAS DAZZLING WHITE BENEATH HIS SPOTLESSLY NEW VESTMENTS . AND THIS NEWLY-ORDAINED PRIEST PREPARED TO SAY HIS FIRST MASS IN A DUBLIN INNER CITY CHURCH.
THE GOSPEL THAT DAY WAS THE SAME GOSPEL WE HAVE JUST READ. OH BUT HE HAD DONE HIS RESEARCH FOR THIS HOMILY. HE HAD LOST TRACK OF THE NUMBER OF BOOKS HE MADE REFERENCE TO.
AFTER THE MASS TWO OLD LADIES WERE SITTING AT THE BACK OF THE CHURCH. ONE SAID TO THE OTHER: “ISN’T THAT A BEAUTIFUL PRIEST MARY WITH ALL THE LOVELY ACUTRAMENTS AND ALL. WHAT DID YOU THINK OF HIS SERMON MARY?
“WELL”, MARY REPLIED “I WISH I KNEW AS LITTLE ABOUT MARRIAGE AS HE DOES”
WHEN I JOINED THE COMMUNITY HERE AT GLENSTAL ONE OF THE OLDER MONKS SAID TO ME “YOU HAVE JOINED THIS COMMUNITY FOR VARIOUS REASONS – BUT IF YOU ARE TO LAST THE COURSE YOU WILL NEED DIFFERENT REASONS”.
I IMAGINE THE SAME COULD BE SAID ABOUT MARRIAGE. THE EXILERATING JOY OF LOVE WHICH BRINGS PEOPLE TOGETHER IN THE FIRST PLACE – IS REPLACED BY A DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE WHICH EVOLVES THROUGHOUT THE LIFETIME OF A MARRIAGE.
JESUS ASKED PILATE: “WHAT IS TRUTH?”
HE COULD HAVE ASKED THE SAME QUESTION REGARDING LOVE.
FROM THE DAWN OF HUMANKIND LOVE HAS BEEN EXPRESSED IN ART, IN IN LITERATURE, IN POETRY, IN DRAMA, IN NOVELS, IN MUSIC.
ROMEO AND JULIET – SHEAKSPEARE’S TREMENDOUS STORY OF YOUNG AND PASSIONATE LOVE WHERE BEFORE THE END OF THE PLAY BOTH OF THEM ARE DEAD.
LOVE STORY WAS ONE OF THE MOST POPULAR BOOKS OF THE 1970’S.
IT BEGAN WITH THE FOLLOWING LINE:
“WHAT CAN YOU SAY ABOUT A 25 YEAR-OLD GIRL WHO HAS DIED?”
THE FILM WAS AS SUCCESSFUL AS THE BOOK. ONE OF THE QUOTES FROM LOVE STORY WHICH WAS TAKEN UP AS ONE OF THE CATCH-PHRASES OF THE 1970’S IS:
“LOVE MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU ARE SORRY”.
I AM ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN THAT ST. BENEDICT WOULD NOT HAVE AGREED WITH THAT STATEMENT!
BUT WHAT IS LOVE? THERE IS THE IDEAL LOVE AND THERE IS ALSO THE REALISTIC LOVE. WE MUST AT ALL COSTS PRESERVE THE SUPREME IDEALISM OF LOVE. IT IS SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL, ENDURING AND EVERLASTING. NOBODY GETTING MARRIED CAN THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE. HAVE WE NOT ALL AT LEAST HAD A GLIMPSE OF THIS LOVE IN OUR LIVES?
JESUS DESCRIBES THE FATHER IN TERMS OF THIS IDEALISTIC LOVE. AS THE FIRST READING SUGGESTS WE ARE MADE IN THE IMAGE OF GOD AND OUR LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER IS THE MOST PERFECT IMAGE OF GOD WE HAVE. AND WE MUST NEVER DIMINISH OR TARNISH THIS LOVE.
BUT WE ARE ALSO FLESH AND BLOOD AND WE MAKE MISTAKES. WE CAN CREATE DEVASTATING FANTASIES FOR OURSELVES. WE FALL IN LOVE, WE GET MARRIED; WE SWEAR VOWS OF ETERNAL LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER. BUT WE CAN END UP CREATING FOR OURSELVES A HELL ON EARTH.
BUT THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COIN IS THAT MANY, MANY COUPLES HAVE LIVED TOGETHER LOVINGLY AND SUCCESSFULLY FOR THE ENTIRETY OF THEIR MARRIED LIVES.
A GROUP OF MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN WERE AT A SEMINAR ON HOW TO LIVE IN A LOVING RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR HUSBANDS. THEY WERE ASKED: “HOW MANY OF YOU LOVE YOUR HUSBAND?” THEY ALL RAISED THEIR HANDS.
THEN THEY WERE ASKED: “WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU TOLD YOUR HUSBAND YOU LOVED HIM?” THERE WERE VARIOUS ANSWERS RANGING FROM – THAT MORNING TO WELL… THEY COULDN’T REMEMBER WHEN.
THEY WERE TOLD TO TAKE THEIR PHONES AND TO TEXT THEIR HUSBANDS THE FOLLOWING WORDS – “I LOVE YOU SWEETHEART”
HERE ARE SOME OF THE REPLIES THEY RECEIVED FROM THEIR HUSBANDS:
“WHO IS THIS?”
“DID YOU CRASH THE CAR?”
“JUST TELL ME HOW MUCH YOU NEED?”
“I THOUGHT WE AGREED YOU WOULDN’T DRINK DURING THE DAY”
THIS IS MORE THE REALITY OF WHAT LOVING RELATIONSHIPS REALLY ARE ALL ABOUT. ACCEPTING THE OTHER IN THEIR ENTIRITY, WARTS AND ALL.
BUT THERE IS ALSO THE REALITY THAT IF SOME COUPLES REMAINED TOGETHER THEY WOULD HAVE DESTROYED EACH OTHER COMPLETELY – NOT TO MENTION THEIR CHILDREN.
THERE IS ALWAYS THE STRUGGLE BETWEEN THE LOVE WHICH WE KNOW IS GODLIKE AND GOD-GIVEN – AND THE HUMILITY WE NEED TO ACCEPT THE FUNDAMENTAL REALITY OF WHO AND WHAT WE ARE
GOD BLESSES EACH LOVING MARRIAGE. GOD GIVES MARRIED COUPLES THE GRACE AND THE RESOURCES FOR THAT LOVE TO FLOURISH – FOREVER.
AT THE RECEPTION TO CELEBRATE 50 YEARS OF HAPPILY MARRIED LIFE, THE COUPLE WAS ASKED WHAT THEIR SECRET WAS FOR THEIR LONG AND LOVING RELATIONSHIP. TO WHICH THEY ANSWERED TOGETHER:
“TWO WORDS – YES DEAR”.
THERE IS A LESSON FOR ALL OF US IN THESE WISE WORDS – WHETHER WE ARE MARRIED OR NOT.